ADHD and Perimenopause

As I work on getting this site up and running, so many things are going through my brain.  What do I want to talk about? What are the things people want to read about? What was I just doing? Where are my keys? Oh, I Have to pee…

That is basically my everyday stream of consciousness.  With perimenopause comes memory loss, or just an overall absent mindedness.  Frequently forgetting where I put things or what I was doing.  Why did I just walk into this room? This seems to be so much worse than I thought, mainly because, on top of perimenopause, I was recently diagnosed with ADHD!  So, I already deal with forgetting things, and I already have to write everything down the minute I think of it or, it’s gone, forever. 

Since many symptoms are shared by both ADHD and perimenopause.  It is hard to tell which is which. I got my ADHD diagnosis and probably started perimenopause around the same time, so, are my ADHD symptoms worse now because I am aware of them or is it because the perimenopause is making them worse?  I will probably never know, or maybe once I am in menopause I will be able to tell the difference.

What are the shared symptoms, you ask? 

According to Healthline (ADHD and Menopause: Changing Symptoms and Treatments)

"There is some crossover between the mental health and cognitive symptoms of ADHD and menopause. For instance, during menopause you may experience Brain fog, forgetfulness, poor executive function and emotional changes" These are all things that women with ADHD already struggle with, so perimenopause can make them worse.  In that same article from Healthline, I also learned that the "Lower estrogen levels can also effect the efficacy of stimulant medications, which are used to treat ADHD." Which is a good thing to know, and I should probably talk to my psychiatrist about.

I got my diagnosis a few years ago, probably 2022 (I can't remember).  I was not seeking it; I was just talking to my therapist (who happens to specialize in ADHD) about something non-related and she asked, “have you ever considered getting tested for ADHD?”

I was kind of blown away, I hadn't ever really thought about it.  She talked to me about why she had made the suggestion, and we decided to begin the screening process. It took three full one-hour sessions of questions plus I had to talk to my mom about how I was when I was a kid. In 2022, I was 41. The thought of going through my whole life with undiagnosed ADHD blew me away. But after more conversations and all the pointed questions my therapist asked, it made so much sense. 

I am a people pleaser, I have been for as long as I can remember, I had made changes to my behavior to make the people around me happy, which managed to mask most of my ADHD traits.  The traits that I couldn’t hide were diagnosed as bi-polar when I was 18. Impulsiveness, hyper focus, extreme highs and lows, things that were not controlled by anti-depressants or mood stabilizers.  The doctors couldn’t figure out why my lows and highs didn’t last as long as “typical” bi-polar episodes, so I eventually got a “bi-polar lite” diagnosis.  That was quite literally the biggest bull shit diagnosis I had ever heard of. But they continued to medicate me, and I continued to hope it would help with some of my symptoms.  I tried so many different drugs with very little results.

Shortly before my ADHD diagnosis, I decided to get off all my meds.  They weren’t working, I didn't feel like myself, I didn't even know who “myself” was anymore because I had been on meds for so long.  The therapist that I was seeing at the time had been my therapist since 2019, so she knew me pretty well. It turns out that my antidepressants were masking my ADHD symptoms, just enough that when I stopped taking them, she made the connections.

My PCP recently told me that they usually will prescribe Wellbutrin for perimenopause symptoms, namely hot flashes and night sweats.  I tried Wellbutrin over the years of trying to treat my “bipolar symptoms”. I was not a fan.  It actually made me a little ragey, I gained weight, and it was not a good medication for me. Keep in mind, when I did try it, I was in my mid-thirties, so things might have changed since then, however, I am probably not going to try it again.  I am angry enough as it is, I don't need more meds making me angrier.

While doing a little research into antidepressants and their role in perimenopause treatment, I found this website, goodrx.com.  As I read through it, I feel like there is some good information on there, however, I do not know the reliability of that info. I will share with you, solely for your research purposes. If you chose to take it at face value, that's on you. I would recommend cross referencing and also talking with a doctor (or two).

On this site, I found this fun little quiz, are you in Perimenopause, which could be a good place to start if you are unsure about your symptoms. 7 Perimenopause Symptoms to Watch for After Age 40 - GoodRx

I did take the quiz; it took all of 45 seconds to answer the questions.  My results were:

Well, look at that, I got distracted again and forgot where I was going with this post.  In short, I feel like the ADHD has made my forgetfulness worse as my perimenopause symptoms have increased. I have to write everything down.  I always carry a notebook or my phone’s notepad with me.  That way if I have to remember something I have a place to record it.  My memory is so bad right now that I will forget something literally the moment, I look away from it.  A great example would be at work. I work in a lab, so I will have a list of chemicals that I need on my computer.  From the time that I look at the list and turn away from my computer to go get those chemicals, I have already forgotten what they are.  Because it’s a lab and having a notebook or paper isn’t always practical, I frequently have chemical names written on my gloves so I can remember what they are as I travel the 6 feet between my computer to the chemical storage.  

As I talked a little bit about, there are ways to cope with the brain fog and forgetfulness.  As a woman with ADHD, I have spent most of my life writing things down, so I don't forget, I did this even before I got my diagnosis. I have a digital calendar, a white board calendar, a paper calendar and a book planner (That I keep with me most of the time).  I do this so I don't forget things, however there is sometimes an issue with me putting something in one calendar and forgetting to add it to another.  Adding an event or task to multiple places helps solidify the memory, I also have a reminder alarm set for my digital calendar, which is a huge help. I highly recommend having a notebook or task list with you always, even though we all have cell phones now with reminders, sometimes being able to physically write something vs dictating or typing something will help with the memorization.

Here are some additional links that may help with coping and sorting out all of the fuckery with ADHD and perimenopause

Menopause, Hormones, and ADHD Symptoms in Women: An Overview

ADHD Perimenopause and Menopause: Understanding Hormonal Influences and Medication Strategies

ADHD and the perimenopause and menopause (specifically, start on page 9 of this document)